Wednesday, November 17, 2010

The Man Your Man Could Smell Like

(the title of this post was taken from THAT Ol.d Spi.ce commercial)

Is it a wife's job to support her husband and not fight against him?  I heard a pastor say once that if the husband's final decision is wrong, she should stand by him (or his decision) and not criticize.


A nurse I worked with refused to 'let' her husband, an unemployed engineer, work at a burger joint for $300 a week.  He couldn't find anything else and hated being a 'house husband' (his words).  He felt guilty seeing her go off to work everyday while he sat at home. She said no husband of hers would ever take a job flippin' burgers for that lil bit of chump change.  She would rather work 16 hour days, 7 days a week.  And no, they were not downsizing from their $2800/mth McMansion, selling any of the 3 cars (that all have notes and full coverage), and the kids were not coming out of their $800/mth private preschool/grade school to free up some money.  What was he thinking?

"She could be an anchor in stormy seas or she could let him drift onto the rocks.."

She'd rather work like a dog herself to keep up a lifestyle they obviously couldn't afford.  She was more concerned about what the neighbors thought if they saw him in uniform at the fast food joint.  Besides, he'll come home smellin' like grease everyday.  He barely saw her anymore, and when he did, she was too tired to (in no particular order) cook, talk or make love.  He was used to being the provider and he wanted to work, no matter what.  He wanted to feel 'like a man'.

In this age of  I-gotta-degree-or-two-and-he-better-have-a-white-collar-job-too-cause-I-got-standards, would I have a problem with this?  Nope, 'cause $300/wk is $1200/mth and that's better than $0 any day of the week.  How do I know he won't become the manager/regional manager/v.p. of sales/el presidente/franchisee/or-whatever else comes after that?  Has the potential to smell like success.  Sure, it'll take a lil' time, but he may have just found his niche, I dunno. 

"A woman could be the wind beneath a man's sails or a gale to send him into uncharted waters.."



Val said...

This kind of, for some reason, reminds me of the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Did you know most of them are actually broke? Yep, NeNe and her husband lost their home. But they still try to keep up with the Joneses.

That woman is like a lot of people in this country, living above their means. And that's one of the reasons so many people have lost their homes, quiet as it's kept.

Hopefully he will see the light and take that job. She'll just have to get over it.

Talk with you in a few weeks!

Anonymous said...

Sad, too busy trying to keep their "status" instead of trying to hold on to her relationship. **smh** Good luck to them because they seem headed for disaster. During rough financial times, emotional (and physical) discord with your partner is the W.O.R.S.T. possible thing. And unfortunately, it's often the moment that another person enters the picture.

Penny Wize said...

@ Val

Re: RHOA = train wreck and the epitome of dysfunction. Certainly not indicative of the RHOA that I know and love.

Oh, he took the job and she was MAD AS HELL! Didn't stop her, though. She looks like the walking dead (and I'm being as nice as possible when I say that).

Enjoy yourselves and take lots of pics!

Penny Wize said...

@ mrstdj


You're so right; she continually tears him down, yet she stays quotin' the Bible and such. Nothing's wrong with that(none of us are perfect), just practice what you preach. A man is only going to take so much..

Reggie said...

My grandfather was a farmer. He quit school in the fourth grade to help run the family farm when his father took ill. He could barely read and his counting skills were just a little better.

He used to always say "if you can't make a dollar, then make a dime".

Apparently he had a whole lot more sense than that woman and her husband.

Penny Wize said...

@ Reggie

We could all learn a lot from our fore parents...simple yet practical.